What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and smashed his head on a jagged rock and screamed in anguish. Jill watched in horror as her brother suffered through the agonizing pain. Jack was rushed to the hospital immediately, but despite the doctors' efforts, he died. Jill mourned the loss of her brother for many years after the incident.

How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

My mom so fat, when she jumps gravity pushed her away from the ground

KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

a young boy with no arms or legs log rolls himself outside where he gets struck by lightning

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

your mom is so fat jesus couldnt even lift her spirits

My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

An Asian person drove home safely.

what is white on top and black on the bottom? society... ha ha

What's so great about twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Roast Beef is a solid and Pea Soup is a liquid

What is lazy? My balls. All they do is hang.

What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

kennah campion... being nice

What is the difference of The United States and 10 pounds of shit? Well,considering there are 50 united states,we would take 10 away from 50 for a total of 40. A very simple subtraction problem indeed.

Roses are red, Violets are too. You're bleeding out, I stabbed you.

Why was the black family eating KFC? Because KFC tastes very nice and there was a discount on the family bucket.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

if girls witth big boobs work at hooters where does the girl with one leg work.... walmart

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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