Q: What do you call Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. A: two things: Their names, and a doctor because they are both in need of a nutritionist.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

roses are red violets are blue some poems are good and some don't

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

Jason's Wife said to him I love you before I left to head to work, Jason then went back inside to see no one was there and he remembered his wife died in 2009.

Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

a. why? b. because I wanted

Q: Where does the queen of england live? A: This was the question I had to anwser to be able to post this joke.

What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into your grandmother and finding a fish

What did the brick say to the wall? Nothing, as they are both inanimate objects that lack knowledge and the sense to speak.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

Why was the girl crying? She had just been severely raped.

A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

Why did litltle Susie drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

The man was so gay he grew breasts and got breast cancer.

A dog walks into a bar. The owner got a fake service dog identification and everyone really enjoyed it.

A white guy, a black guy, an asian guy, an indian sit together. Canada

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

what's worse than the holocaust? black people whats worse than black people? mexicans Whats worse than mexicans? 2 mexicans Whats worse than 2 mexicans? Africa

what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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