- Anti Joke

i want to meet Dora's parents and ask them why they let that bitch go everywhere

Kindness is what makes the world go round..... and chocolate.

Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

Wanna hear something funny? David is addicted to mw3 like the other 3 million people!

Whats worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Finding an apple in your worm

Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

Q: Were did suzy go after the explosion? A: Everywere

a blonde girl walks into a bar...of soarp, slips, falls, and breaks her spine.

Dont read this joke

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Q:When a T- Rex walks into your house what does it mean? A: Your on pot, T-rex's are extinct

what did one dog say to another dog? ....nothing, because they can only bark.

You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

Why did the Asian Kid pass his test? He studied hard.

Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

Cody went to the store. Big Floppy Donkey Dick.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead. Dead people can't drive.

whats worse than finding ten dead babies in one recycling bin finding ten dead babies in one trashcan ---sticksack

Who's dumb and retarted. A person that is dumb and retarted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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