What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Hypothermia

punchline below punchline above

That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

What did the taxi friver say to the man? "You forgot your briefcase"

what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

http://www.com/

A black man and a white man crash their cars. they promptly exchange insurance information and apologize to each other about the inconvenience.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

Your mama is so stupid she has an IQ lower than an average person.

Man: Doctor, everything I touch hurts. Doctor: Okay. Let's test it out by first touching your leg. Man: It hurts. Doctor: What about your arm? Man: It hurts as much. Doctor: What about your back? Man: It still hurts. Doctor: I see......your fingers are broken.

What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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