Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, a bus hit it half way along and it died instantly.

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A man is pulled over because he is suspected of drunk driving. The officer comes to the window and is greeted by a man who then replies: What seems to be the officer, problem?

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Lol you respond here goood one AAANDEEERS TEN MG PER PILL Asswhipe! Besides friends call me Black Metal, you can call me Nero the avenger. Line kinda broke up with you first, you think she would send you a picture with my finger on her... cough... AND THINK YOU WOULD STILL STIck aROUND WITH HER? Id be more... well glad for your mothers sake, btw, she got me flowers, I wont tell the rest, but she got me another pic... Okay ill tell the rest then, first pic is my fingas, the other is my limpo in her mouth... The third is the funny doctor which caught us and wanted all three of us to be on the pic... Aww, no really man, you had a gem, we where good friends before me and Line, but she did not want to leave before she got me flowers... Aww... Ooooh... Oh! Well not yet but you get the picutre. I got ur message, sure im high as a kite, but I know what im doing if you can "picture" what I mean... Dont tell your mom btw, I want to surprise her, (reverse psychology) hmm, that did I write that? Anyway, how is your sister doing? I dont think she gives those strangely long hugs to anyone but me, and she laughed wen i got a boner... NERO, never call me, never ever call Me black, besides its either Mr.Black, oor black metla you rat! VALIUM? SERIOUSLY? Ill get that test extended you know... Because POISONING!

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why did the boy cry because i punched him so hard in the face he shit out his teeth for the next three weeks

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why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

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Knock-Knock Who's there? A giant spider-like insect that lays eggs in your brain which turn into larvae that drop down onto your tongue and eat your teeth slowly, then form a cocoon and turn into the spider-like insect spoken of previously. You then wake up from this terrible nightmare and get ready for your well paying job.

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Why did the black man quit his job as a rapper? Because he was an admirable father and husband and was willing to sacrifice his passion to provide for those he loved.

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One day a black man went and bought a car with his own hard-earned money.

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Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

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What would Chuck Norris do if you insulted him? Nothing. He probably doesn't have time for such foolishness.

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Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

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What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He applied for a Visa and was granted authorization to live and work in the United States on a permanent basis.

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Sammi suck kyles chode

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

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how do you tell the difference between a jew and a muslim? you ask them what their religion is.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A painting with black, white and red paint.

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What do you call a lubia chin jew slave? Kia

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get slaughtered.

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What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing they just waved

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not suzie!!

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Q: What would you do if i pushed you down the stairs A: I would suffer from serious head injuries thus filling you with guilt for performing such a deed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I told him to. I'm very influential.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops