What did the two Japanese men say to each other? I have no idea I don't speak Japanese

Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

A man walks into a bar. Cool story, bro.

What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

Why did the black guy buy watermelon? It was on sale.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown.

CHORGLUND

Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

why didnt the black guy die on the bus fire? The fire was in the front of the bus!

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why'd he fall off again? Because we put him back on.

What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

Women are like fish. It's hard to tell when they are crying underwater.

What did the Jew get for Christmas ....... An ashtray

Why are there so many little girls falling off swing jokes? Because you tuch youself at night.

Q. What do you call a person with no arms, legs, torso, or head? A. A mutilated corpse.

What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse then the Holocaust? Two Holocausts

How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

Why did the girl fall over? She was poisoned for being the fairest one of all.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting shot in the knee several times and bleeding to a slow and painful death.

Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

Why did the Mexican steal a pack of tortillas? To feed his family. He didn't have the necessary funds to pay for it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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