I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

Q: Why did you get raped last week? A: Because at night you touch yourself to pictures of rapists.

What's big, old, and brown? A tree.

I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Whats funny and has 2 wheels The holocaust, I lied about the wheels, and the funny

What did the horse say to the farmer who tried to feed him hay soup? I don't like that.

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are having a baby. Even Stevie Wonder saw that one coming.

Your momma so fat when she went to the beach she was to self concious and left her shirt on.

Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? Because he was a heroin addict

Two friends were hanging out. One of them asks, "what's that awful smell?" the other replies, "I AM NOT A ROBOT!"

what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

In 2030, what will most people be doing for a living? Using food stamps.

Q: What do you get when you put a boy and a girl together in a locked room? A: Blood and gore.

Yo' mamas so fat that your friend said a yo mama so fat joke to you. You were certainly not amused.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley, I live next door.

What is a white man in a white shirt called A white man in a white shirt

What happened to the couple that got married? They went on their honeymoon.

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

What did the dead guy say to the other guy? "You murdered me." How did he hear the dead guy? He was dead too.

A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

Your mother is so fat. We are all extremely concerned for her health.

Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

What's red and has zippers? Nothing, because watermelons can't physically drive without the help of a sheeps spinal cords ... DUH

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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