Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

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Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

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A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

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What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

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a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

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A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

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Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

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Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

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Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

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Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a nice man.

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Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

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Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

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Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

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A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

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What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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