why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why didn't Hellen Keller just wear glasses? Oh wait

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS. AIDS is worse.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

thumb_up thumb_down -86

Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

thumb_up thumb_down -86

What happened after four homosexual clowns all squeezed into a little toy car simultaneously? Children and parents alike were amazed by this feat, and considered their $5 entrance fee very well spent.

thumb_up thumb_down -138

( I PLAYED SKRILLESX's SONG ON MAX VOLUME ) My neighbours loved? this so much they invited the police round!

thumb_up thumb_down +133

What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

thumb_up thumb_down +115

knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

thumb_up thumb_down +95

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The customers observing this quickly leave because the bartender is talking to a horse, which does not talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

thumb_up thumb_down +27

I'm funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops