Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

roses are read violets are blue u suck and ur gay

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

Womens rights

Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

Hi Adam,

A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Nice legs....What time do they open?

One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

extraction interveal means the opposite of integer

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

Joshua Brown was in a dark forest, with a misty haze surrounding him. He turned quickly and flicked his hair out of his face. Dylan Hodge appeared and they had wild sex all night!

What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

What happened to the power lifter that tried to deadlift 920 lbs while wearing nothing but his briefs? he succeeded because he is trained power lifter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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