Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why do black people were white shirts?..they feel like it

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down

yo momma is so ugly, she is unpleasant to look at!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

black

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Three guys and 4 Catholics are in a bar. They guys are making a joke. The first one says I'm gonna go to Oregon there's no Catholics there and the second one says I'm gonna go to Ohio there is no Catholics there and the third one says I'm gonna go to Alaska there's no Catholics there and one of the Catholics walk up and say how about you go to hell theres no Catholics there.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

MLG 420 NO SCOPE THE JEWS

thumb_up thumb_down -114

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops