Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face", the horse replies I have an extra 21st chromosome.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

9/11

what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

why did the chicken cross the road? why should a chickens motives be questioned

What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

Whats Red and smells like Blue Paint? Red Paint.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

Netball.

Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the girl. Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He has cerebral palsy.

My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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