Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

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clamidia

What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Roses are read bacon is good poems are hard .........BACON

A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

A Horse walks into a bar. So the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The Horse replies "My jockey raped me".

You're mama's so fat: she has to wear plus size clothing

Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

What is the punchline of this joke? There isn't one.

i have cancer

What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

why did the chicken cross the road? why should a chickens motives be questioned

How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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