How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

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How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

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Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

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why is billy g is really supid because he gets bad grades

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A horse walked into a barn...

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Hitler. lol, sucks.

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what do you do if there is a black person in your front yard? tell him to leave...

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Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Weird, orange is my favorite color.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Womens rights

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What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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