how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

Knock, knock Who's there? Who. Who who? ... Who?

What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

Why was the little boy sad? He tried to dry off his puppy in the oven.

How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

whats worse then getting robbed by a black man? -getting hit by a bus due to not having the needed currency to get a ride home

Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

What is the punchline of this joke? There isn't one.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

Question 1 - What is 1 + 1 = Hospital

Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

Why did the plane crashed? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

9/11

what is white and red all over? a ginger

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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