I like turtoes.

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Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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A blind man walks into the door of a bar

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What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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What's the difference between a duck A chair Vests have no sleeves

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Rebecca Black's new album.

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

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a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

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What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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