Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

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What has 4 legs and doesn't bark? A dead dog.

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What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

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What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

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Reduce, reuse, recycle Anti-joke.com

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Q-- Why did the boy stop playing football? A -- He had to go for his tea

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Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

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How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

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So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

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Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

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What do you call a guy with newmonya? Not good at spelling

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you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

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How many women are in the world? a little over 3.2 billion because statistics show that there are roughly 51-52% females in the whole population of humans

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An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop?...... Dr Dre.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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