how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

123457

Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

what is darker than black?... YOU

Want to hear a joke? Me to...

Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

How do you evolve a Pikachu into a Raichu? You use a Thunderstone.

What did the thief get for Christmas? Nothing. He was sentenced to the death penalty.

What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

A BABY seal walks into a club

you.

Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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