Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

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all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

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Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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What's a vampire's favorite subject in school? Probably math.

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Why do black people always say to the left to the left... because they don't have rights.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! That is a joke which very few people would find even mildly entertaining.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

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A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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