I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer, pays, and leaves.

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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here kitty kitty

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

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One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

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What's bad for your teeth? A brick

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i have cancer

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A black man bought a large condom because he has a big penis.

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Q:What do you call a black man on the moon? A:A problem. Q:What do you call 100 black men on the moon? A:A problem. Q:What do you call the entire race of black people on the moon? A:A problem solved

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

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Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

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whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

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I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops