How do you make a baby stop crying? Drown it in vinegar.

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What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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Knock Knock? Come in.

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What's the difference between two telephone poles? T-shirts! Because motorcycles don't have doors!

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? rape

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You should put some sand in your vagina to make the crabs feel more at home.

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Q: Whats green and has wheels? A: Any form of motorized vehicle that is made for transportation and has a green paint scheme.

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Guess What!? What?! GIGGITY GIGGITY GOOOOOOOOO!!!!! (ALL RIGHT) OH.

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how many niggaz dose it take to fit in al lightbolb?? 36 ahahahh yall deez nutz

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Knock knock. Who's there? AV. AV who? Asshole vison. Now that's Amusement Vision. (Remembering Amusement Vision...)

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Did you know that Obama wasn't born in the United States*? *the contiguous United States

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Jacob licked out his buthole again. It was becoming a usual thing for him to do, it suddenly became one of his hobbies and wanted to lick more, so he started licking MR. Macs

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haha

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What's the difference between a horse and a gorilla? Their penis size. Horses have relatively large penises, while gorillas are known to have the smallest penises proportional to their body size.

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What did the Christian say to the Muslim? Our faiths are actually derived from the same Judeo base.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? An alive one at the bottom eating its way up.

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Why did the blonde get a tattoo of her adress on her arm? She never wanted to forget her great childhood at her family home, and she hoped that she would come back some day.

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why am i so sexy? I was raised by a dog.

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guy walks into a bar. other guy says to him, "are you blind"? "yes", he answered.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. The rest of the bar patrons are thoroughly confused.

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a korean man with no legs sits on a porch. He has no legs so it's considered standing

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Whats brown and sticky? Poop on a warm summers night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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