why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

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I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

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Is your refrigerator running? I heard there was a power outage in your area.

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You ask your friend if they want to hear a joke when they say yes tell them that thought you had a joke

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walk into your friend’s house and say “what’s up with the dead guy out front?” (you have to murder a person for this joke to work)

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Roses are red Violets are blue Dandelions are weeds

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Your momma so poor, she has a hard time paying her bills.

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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

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Hey Lady Gaga, Madonna called, she wants her clothes back; she lend them to you weeks ago for a concert because you didn't have anything to wear and you haven't returned them yet.

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What did the jew do to his waiter? He explained how he had provided excellent service and left a very generous tip to applaud his efforts.

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I got a boner from the waitress touching my shoulder, please dislike this

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

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Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

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Two monkeys are lying in a tree. Big monkey and little monkey, little monkey bites the big monkey's tale, big monkey starts jumping around the place shouting. Little monkey just starts laughing and takes another sip of whiskey.

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Why did Billy fall off the slide? Someone threw a refridgerator at his face.

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A narwhall walks into a store and asks the cashier where he keeps the soap products. The cashier does not speak english.

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John Cena

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? (knocker runs for life).

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When life gives you lemons you squirt them in someones eyes and steal what life gave them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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