Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the kangaroo die? Because two stapled koalas fell on its head.

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Gladly, you sound very confident, makes me happy. Well, doctors thought I had ADHD (go figure) but I am pretty calm outside the internet, then they went with ADD, but since my attention is twofold, this meaning that I can get a lecture, while noticing a toothpick falling on the other side of the room (noticing as in perceiving with focus not necessarily listening but you know, seeing from the corner of ones eye) Yet still focus well enough to get the lecture in details. So its not split focus such as in ADD, but dual, as in me being able to think about two things at once, but also burning out extremely fast, which again, is far from ADD.

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What did the mentally disabled child say to the snowman? Mnnghhhmuhmuhhu ooh ooh ooh!

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How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

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Whats werst than taking candy from a baby. Throwing a baby off a cliff then eating the candy in fronts of its parents

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whats long, hard and full of seamen submarine

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What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

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What the librarian say to the man? Hi, can I help you?

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why did the Cow die....? He didnt!!!!

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what came first the chicken or the chips

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You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

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How do you keep a woman from driving your car? Shoot her.

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If I had a nickel for everyday I lived...... I would get a nickel a day

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What's the difference between an American and a British guy? Their fingerprints.

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding the holocaust? A worm

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What did Tiger Woods say when his wife hit him with a golf club? "Why did you hit me with a golf club".

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Why did the little girl cry? She lives in Haiti.

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what do jason kidd and michael jackson have in common? they are both actually black

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender in five states.

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Whats happening when you see your TV floating at night? You are probably suffering from some sort of mental disorder which causes spontaneous hallucinations and should seek medical help before the condition worsens.

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Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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