What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

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What did the zombie say to the woman? I like turtles.

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Q : WHAT DID THE SMALL SHEEP SAY TO THE BIG SHEEP ? Z : BÆÆÆ

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What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany? He commented on the models and designs, and asked to try a few out. Then he left, saying he would consider buying one but didn't want to commit too suddenly or too soon.

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Why is Andrew sleeping? Because he took and overdose on sleeping pills, he probably died in his sleep.

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flashback 2010 bears vs. packers vs. bears- why did'nt the packers want to go to soldier field? because they didnt want to pass another 6 flags!

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A black man, a small child, and a priest were all standing in line. They were all checking in the hospital after being in a 3 car pileup

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The next sentence is true. The last sentence was a lie.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

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Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

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What happens when you throw a blue rock into red water? It gets wet...

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So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

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Knock, Knock Whos There, Jews, Jes who, Whould you like some jews with that.

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Yo mama's so fat that she needs substantially larger clothes than most other people

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Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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Why was the guy tired? His titties were too big

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I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

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FREE SEX! Now that I have your attention.............

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Sigh, visit me with a pack of condoms, that is so romantic... Now you tell me something, how old are you REALLY and what is your real name? Oh yeah, my first name is Tifa (I know you hate it for some reason), and I am turning 24 in 30 days.

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Chocolate makes everything better, except obesity.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? Cooked until it reaches an internal temperature of 180 degrees Fahrenheit to lower the risk of contracting diseases such as salmonella.

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How do you tell the difference between a white family, and an albino black family? The albino black family suffers from a lack of pigmentation, while the white family just has a naturally pale skintone.

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How do you say a bad word in your language? Like this: "A bad word in your language"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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