Q: What's worse than finding a hundred dead babies, in one bin? A: Finding one dead baby, in a hundred bins.

Why didn't the woman need a watch? Because she had both her hands amputated after battling diabetes.

What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she's a woman

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar and ask the bartender for a drink, but in response the bartender politely points out that there are probably people in need of their assistance at their respective place of warship.

Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

Why can't february march Because april may

what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

What is Ron afraid of? Spiders!

thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

You're so sweet I have diabetes

Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

What do you call a squirrel in my yard? Dead.

Asians

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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