How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

why couldnt the mexican jump the fence? He broke his leg.

Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock Who's there THE CHICKEN

1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

My wife has terminal cancer.

Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

Hey, you have small hands.

- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

A Horse walks into a bar. So the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The Horse replies "My jockey raped me".

Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

And if a chicken had wings it wouldn't bump it's butt when it landed.

Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

A boy dares his friend to jump off the walking bridge. The boy's friend accepts the dare and jumps. What happens next? The boy brain is splattered on the ground.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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