Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

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On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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what did the Spanish priest say to the Ukranian gynocologist? *fart*

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

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How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

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what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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A young christian boy walks into a church and gets raped

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a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

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YOLO

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Whats 9 + 10 19

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

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What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

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Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops