Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

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What is black and beats up white people? a cop you racist!

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- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

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What's wrong with the muffler man? his body.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

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Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

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Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

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What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

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how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

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Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

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What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

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A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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What's the difference between a black person and a white person? They have different skin tones.

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What rymes with milk..... milf

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Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

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your mom

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Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

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Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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