How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

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Know what's worse than being publicly embarrassed in front of your crush? Jeffrey dahmer

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

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My wife has terminal cancer.

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- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

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Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

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what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

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Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

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how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

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Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

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my names jim haha

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What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

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A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

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Three guys and 4 Catholics are in a bar. They guys are making a joke. The first one says I'm gonna go to Oregon there's no Catholics there and the second one says I'm gonna go to Ohio there is no Catholics there and the third one says I'm gonna go to Alaska there's no Catholics there and one of the Catholics walk up and say how about you go to hell theres no Catholics there.

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What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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