how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

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My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

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Magic Johnson has AIDS

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What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

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clamidia

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Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

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pussy enough said

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Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

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A Horse walks into a bar. So the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The Horse replies "My jockey raped me".

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Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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What is the loneliest number to exist? Zero. Except it's not lonely. I'm just saying there are zero lonely numbers. Numbers aren't sentient. They can't feel loneliness.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

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Q:Where does a woman work at if she has 1 leg? A: IHOP!!! :)

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Do u know what would be a big pain in the ass? A thorn

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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Knock,Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?

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my names jim haha

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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