Why did the Asian eat so much rice? Because he was hungry.

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whats the best part of having sex with twenty-three year olds? there's twenty of them.

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Why was a woman not considered in the role for a stunt driver? Because her skill level was not sufficient enough for the requirements.

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What did the baby say to the man? Babies can't talk ,the baby did not say anythingto the man!

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Just found out that it doesn't work.

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What do tigers dream of when they take a tiger snooze? Mike Tyson

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What's worse than stepping on a nail? stepping on the nail and falling on more nails face first.

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Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

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A woman who lived alone with her parrot left her apartment to run to the store, forgetting that a plumber was scheduled to come and fix her sink. A few minutes later, the plumber arrived and knocked on the door. The parrot inside called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replied, "it's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waited for a bit and, seeing that nobody was coming to the door, knocked again. The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replied, a little more loudly, "it's the plumber! I've come to fix the sink!" Again the plumber waited. After a few more minutes, he knocked again. The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber yelled, as loudly as he could, "IT'S THE PLUMBER! I'VE COME TO FIX THE SINK!" Still, nobody came to the door. The plumber banged the door repeatedly, The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screamed "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIIINK!!!" and then, consumed with rage, clutched his chest and fell over dead from a stress-induced heart attack. A few minutes later, the woman returned home and, while opening her door, noticed the plumber lying dead in her hallway. She looked at her parrot and asked, "Who is it?" The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?"

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Heheheheh, Good one, you made me laugh, you just made me realize that it was indeed I that said that to you once, and now you are telling me. I know now, I am happy, not because I seek happiness, but because thinking, finding solutions, guiding myself and others, is what makes me happy. I feel like an alien, because my ideals, my solutions hopes and dreams that grow out of a result of my constant thinking, will never be in this world. Yet I also feel human now, because it could have been, humanity could have succeeded...

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A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him. A horse walks into a bar Barman says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My mum died this morning".

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What did the Mexican parents name their first born son? Nobody knows. He was adopted by a nice family due to the fact that his biological parents were murdered in cold blood. His foster parents named him Kevin.

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Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

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What is orange, has 7 legs, and makes the same noise as a crow? If you can think of something that fits all of those characteristics, you need help

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if i gave a rats ass, I'd worry about you.

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If god gives you lemons keep the lemon go to the store and buy oranges to make orange juice.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Why couldn't Jack and Jill climb the hill? Because they were bagels.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? It depends on how many seats there are, but some could double-buckle and stuff like that to fit more if necessary.

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What's black and white and red all over? An embarrassed skunk.

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Brian knew how to save the world from the death penalty: "Let's kill everybody who is not against it." So I killed Brian and waste my time in death row now.

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You wanna see something really scary?

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-You know what will always get people fighting? -Hey, you wanna fight?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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