Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

What do you call a Mexican hockey player? A hockey player.

What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

what did the kid say when pee-wee was about to rape him ...huh just make it quick

What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

YOLO

Why doesnt Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesnt float.

What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

A couple arrived at Hospital in less than 3 hours. but actually they wanted to go to the Church...and 3 hours is quite a long time...

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one animal there and it was a dog. It was a shitzoo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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