What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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what has legs but can't walk? a paraplegic

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What's worse then Obama? Nothing

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How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

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What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

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Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

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Whats 9 + 10 19

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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Nice legs....What time do they open?

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One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

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A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

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In Soviet Russia its very cold

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Netball.

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In Soviet Russia, the government kills with famine and genocide.

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What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the girl. Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He has cerebral palsy.

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How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

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Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

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What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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