How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

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That's as gay as AIDS.

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What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

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Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

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how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

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a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

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What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

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How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

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Diana and victoria

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What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

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Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

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Why did the catholic priest go to jail He was a paedophile

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A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

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A black person in the NHL

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What's worse than people repeating a joke about a handicapped child and voting down original, funny, anti-material? Knowing that millions of cubic decimetres of precious air and thousands of tonnes of food are being wasted every day to sustain them...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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