What did the little boy say to his malignant tumour? "Hello" The tumour did not respond.

Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

What do you call a shoe with no laces? Stilettos, sandals, flip flops, slippers, etc...

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

Yo mama is so fat she has a gym membership and a diet plan to lose weight

A man walks into a vagina. The man, expecting a holiday inn, is very confused, and later gets mauled by five bears, who mistook his scent for a fish.

What has a fiery tail and is mentally handicapped? Charetard.

why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

What do stupid fat ugly women always say to me? “I think you have a problem with women.”

man: im hungry can i have a sandwich wife: go make one man: then what are you gonna do

Your momma is so fat because she ate alot!

Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

Why do cows have bad hand writing? because they don't have thumbs

Ring Ring Hello? Click

how do you know your sister is on her period? you dads dick taste like blood.

Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

Get some flipping new jokes people

why did the irishman need plastic surgery? because after the bear attack where there used to be a face there is now a gap

Why did Brooke go to the bathroom? She had to pee

What's got four legs but can't move by itself? A chair.

You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

The name "Hunter Barksdale".

What's 9+10? 19.

Why was the blonde confused? Because she had 10 second memory loss.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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