Whats bigger than a toaster and smaller than an oven? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .... .... . ... . . . ..... ...... ..... a microwave . ..... . ... ...

-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

How do you scare a bonde? tell her you want to be her uterus?

This Haiku is strange There is a dinosaur WOW Snuffleupagus

What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

why did the chicken cross the road to get to your house knock knock whos there the chicken

Yo mama so fat, that she feels uncomfortable in a bathing suit.

What's worse than reading? A lot, but there are too many things to name

What's worse than a broke pencil TWO broken pencilz

there was a Black and Mexican in a car who was driving? the cop

Q: What did the lesbian say to her partner? A: We cannot get married in forty five states.

Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

Q- How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A- You Poke Her Face

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

why did jenny get 22 turnovers in a basketball game? because jenny has down syndrome

What comes after 69? 70

The bears will win the Super Bowl

Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A bleeding penguin.

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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