Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

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1-1 was a race horse, 1-2 was one too, 1-1 won one once and 1-2 won one too

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

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why was the girl raped? she left the kitchen.

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Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

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whats better than 7 babies in one trash can 1 baby in 7 trash cans

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Knock knock, who's there? Doctor. Doctor who?

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What did Larry do when little Billys baseball crashed through his window? He raped and murdered little Billy for Larry has raped and murdered many children.

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A black man and a white man were in a fight. Who won? I don't know. It was pay-per view and I didn't buy it.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

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How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

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A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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your mom is so fat that when she walks in America with a yellow coat as they get a taxi

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A male paltypus usually possesses two poisonous goads under his forelegs. Which makes him potentially more dangerous than a dragon.

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What did the two prostitute say to each other? I dont know, i wasn't there

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

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What did the downsyndrome get for christmas? Aborted

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Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Knock knock Who's there Bill Bill who? Bill Thompson

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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