The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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why is billy g is really supid because he gets bad grades

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why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

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So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

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Why do people discriminate against black people? Because they show an undeserving amount of disrespect towards the rest of the world and why should they get anything better than what they offer.

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how do u get a clown to stop smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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Why did the boy kill his father? Because he was molesting him.

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"Do you know the joke about the No and Me Neither?" "No..." "Me neither."

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What's yellow and dangerous? China.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

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Womens rights

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A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a human being of Aztec descent, while a bench is an inanimate object used most frequently as a place to sit.

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

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Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

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A young christian boy walks into a church and gets raped

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

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Knock knock. Whose there. Uninterupting black lady. Uninter.... MMMMMMMHHHHMMMM. Black ladies never listen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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