Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

Why did the plane crashed? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

Q: Whats Faster than a bullet A: A Jew chasing coin

Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the girl. Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He has cerebral palsy.

What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? Prosthetic arms.

I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

A Horse walks into a bar. So the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The Horse replies "My jockey raped me".

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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