Know what's worse than being publicly embarrassed in front of your crush? Jeffrey dahmer

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

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your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

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What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

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What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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What's worse then Obama? Nothing

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Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

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A man walks into a bar. Inside he finds Hitler, his wife, and an angry badger. They are pleased to see him and they all relate to each other through their shared love of bocce ball.

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Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

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I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

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What did Lil Jimmi received at his birthday ? A red fire truck and he loved it

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How Long is a Chinese name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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