Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

What is black and beats up white people? a cop you racist!

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

So much oil was spilled into the ocean that it is killing animals.

Ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

What did the man do after a bad day at work? He went home and beat his wife

My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and they cut his head off

One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

It's funny, because she's twice his size!

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What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

Knock, knock Who's there? Who. Who who? ... Who?

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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