How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Politics.

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

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What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

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Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

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Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

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Animal

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Why was the black guy good at basketball? He practiced hard everyday.

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Johny wanted a pogo stick for his birthday. Johny's mom got him a pogo stick for his birthday. The day of Johny's birthday, he fell off the pogo stick and broke his arm.

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"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

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Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

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how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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