roses are red violets are too im bleeding

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did Johnny do this wednesday? He went to school to be academically taught to get a high GPA of all the other children so he could go and pursuit his dream so he won't be left at home with a drunk wife and 6 kids with $190,000 in debt from the IRS

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: There was a train wreck in the middle of nowhere, every one died, no one saw the train wreck, so how did the story about the wreck get out? A:Many philosophers believe that the universe is a figment of its own imagination. Therefore, if "the universe" decided that it wanted the story to get out, it could have just made it so since it is its own imagination.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q What happened to the kid with diabetis and a one legged mom A. He got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the baker rich? Because he had a lot of money

thumb_up thumb_down -12

a sausage maker buys a box of cereal

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man is playing pacman, on his last life, and is cornered. He inserts another coin in the slot.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a purple apple? Bruised.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the little boy viciously slash the orange object with a carving knife? Because it was Halloween.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the kid drop his ice-cream? Because he tripped on a dead guy!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock Who's there The Holocaust!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red Violets are blue Start running Cuz ima F*** you Runn Forest Runn! Jubie

thumb_up thumb_down -12

i have a black person in my family tree he's still hanginh

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is blue and on the bottom of the pool. A drowned baby

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your mumma is so fat, she has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops