What do you call 1 + 1 = 2? i like boobs

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What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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I went to a restaurant, but after I ate the food felt sick, then I remembered that I ordered penis with cum Popsicles so I knew it couldn't be the food

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Why did Henry fall down the stairs? Nobody knows, nobody cares. Poor Henry.

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Q: What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's Jewish.

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You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

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There once was a man named Steve. One day, Steve stumbled stupidly, shredding his shirt, shoes and shorts and subsequently shocking Susie; a small shy salsa student. When he arrived home, Steve's wife asked "how was your day dear?" Steve panicked at the thought of having to explain this traumatic event, but thankfully he had undergone speech therapy for his lisp.

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Q: What happened when the rich man got married? A:His wife stole everything he had and left him a cold and broken man.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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What do you call a drunk, blind, deaf monkey driving a car? A bloody good driver!

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* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

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What happened to the man who ate a piece of pizza after doing a lot of sit ups, while rubbing the belly of a fat man, and feeding his baby at the same time? He Lived

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What has equally bad consequences as breaking someone's leg in front of the local authorities? Breaking your own leg on purpose in front of the local authorities.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? Just in case he gets a hole in one! -LEts Go Mets P.S the comment below is also very stupid

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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How do you make a snake blink? You can't

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What do you call your mom after she brings a guy home from a bar? A very caring woman because she doesn't want him driving drunk.

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Did you hear about the Polish submarine? It was one of five in the Polish Navy.

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A man gets shot in the balls by a huge swarm of bees HE IS VERY NICE AND FILLED WITH RICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by Shrek

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2 Priests and a Monk walk into a bar, All 3 were stabbed to death in a bar fight.

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Why didn't the boy blow out his birthday cake this year? He died last year.

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If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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