What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

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Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

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Why was the boy laughing? Because

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

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Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

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What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house in her back yard? -No Neither did she

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What do you call a paralyzed man on a fishing boat? Robert

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How do you stop a plane? Land it.

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A negro named Kanye walks into a Tavern... He's stoned to death.

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How do you make a Chef cry? You kill his family.

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what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

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Tim: Hey Jennifer, do you wanna hear a joke? Jennifer: Okay Tim: Knock knock Jennifer: Who's there Tim: It's me Tim, you idiot

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Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

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hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

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What do you get if you cross a motorway with a lawnmower? Killed.

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Hey babe, do you like going to sleep without shoes on? Because most people find it more comforting to remove footwear in order to rest and relax peacefully during bedtime.

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View Terms of Service

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why couldn't the man play frisbee? he was a dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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