Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

What's worse than being mugged? Being raped by bulbasaur.

why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

What is black and beats up white people? a cop you racist!

Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

Why did the catholic priest go to jail He was a paedophile

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

knock knock. no one's home..

Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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