Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

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A Hispanic was walking down the street, he turned left and was at his house.

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Sex

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How can a man go 8 days without sleeping? Sleep at night.

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Knock knock. Who's there- oh wait, I don't care. Get away from my house or I am going to call the police.

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If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

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Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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One fish... Two fish... Red fish... I have AIDs

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

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why did the midget beat the basketball player in a foot race? the basketball player got bit by a scorpion and died within minutes.

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what would you watch during a scary movie? anything you want.

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whats purple and attacks like a bear? a purple bear

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Women don't need an education. The only book they need is a recipe book.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers, Delphiniums are also blue.

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Chocolate makes everything better, except obesity.

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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how did hitler lure the jews onto trains to concentration camps? he told them he hid a penny in one of the cars

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A black man a white man and an asian man walk into a bar have a few drinks and on thier drive home run over a three year old little girl and here to month old sister and they go to prison for the rest of thier lives (they shouldn't of let the asian drive)

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Do you know what kind of world I dream of? Until you tell me, no I don't. How could I? I'm not telepathic, after all.

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what do you wear at a funeral? white. lol jk black

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True fact: every rabbit lives their whole cute life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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