What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the girl. Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He has cerebral palsy.

what did max say to shelby? I hate black people.

I'm funny.

A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

My wife has terminal cancer.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

Why did the catholic priest go to jail He was a paedophile

What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

Why did the plane crashed? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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