A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

Rebecca Black

what happens when a panther and a gorilla fight? i dont know i never seen it before.

If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

Knock Knock! Who's there? ....Mrs Murray silently returned to her armchair, a single tear rolling down her weathered cheek. Her lonely existence deepened, as she realised the gang of boys had fooled her again.

Why the kid fall of his bike? He got hit by a fridge.

How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

why does the world spin? Chuck Norris says so

What happened to the little boy who threw a spitball at the teacher? He was killed the next day when the teacher, who had a history of mental instability and schizophrenia, decided to go on a shooting rampage in class.

What did michael jackson say to the boys he touched? Nothing. Hes dead

Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

Why was the guy tired? His titties were too big

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

a father listens to his son while he was on the computer. he heard "BABBY BABBY OHHHHH" and busted in He was releaved to find him masterbating to porn because he thought it was Justin Beiber

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer, then you will die.

there are three types of people in this world, those who can't count, and those who can. STFU, you corny loser

You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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