what is orange and blue 2 colors

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Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted because they were walking in Detroit.

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A blind man walks into a deaf woman. He tries to apologize but she can't hear him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

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why was the toddler sad? he was diagnosed with cancer after his dog was put down because it raped and murdered his parents

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what are three short words? i a am

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What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

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What happened to the black guy who got pulled over by the cops? He was told that his left tail light was out

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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An elderly man farts during Sunday morning mass. The children around him laugh and then their parents remind them to be respectful.

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Q: Whats the biggest lie? A: The Cake...

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whats the differnce between madalin macan and batman?...batman returns

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Unless she's particularly short, then she may need to get a friend, who may or may not be blonde, to help by holding the ladder.

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What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

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Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

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Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

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Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

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How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know. It depends how high the light is.

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Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

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What's worth than a large pile of dead babies? Nothing, you sick freak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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