A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

What did the homeless guy do when he found a quarter? He picked it up

Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

11111

how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

What's 8 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...