What's that smell? Your feces droping in the toilet

What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

Why did the white man accuse the black man of stealing his wallet? Because they were the only two men in the room at the time of the theft

Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

Wumbo

"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

you.

Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suisidal

w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

your mom is so poor that now your family is at risk of losing there home

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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