Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

Gale swallows.

You're on fire.

Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

Why did the creator of Anti-Joke.com make the website? Because he probably wanted to promote his book and make more money.

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

Why did the chickecross the roe? Because I was bein chased by an angry group o mobsters that 8 years ago were busted by the chicken when he was still working for NYPD and found them all in an ally and busted them for later discovered tax evasion and then 2 years later they found a way ou of prison and tracked down the chicken for 6 years until they found him in road island 4509 lake side estates and then proceeded to chase him onto and across a road that was near by to his lake side apartment and then they go tire and we. Back to their HQ in NY and then the leader of the gang went home and in a depression fuels rage mersiouy beat his wife then went up stairs and threw his 9 year old son out the window and hanged himself. The chicken also died because 8 years is at the top of their lifespan.

y did simran cros rode? 2 get 2 uder side ofcurse. stopid nobs

What is worse then rain on your wedding day? Getting married.

A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! That is a joke which very few people would find even mildly entertaining.

How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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